A Game of Cat and Plant
by Annadrujok
Summary: Envy gets captured and taken to Central, where he is to be tortured for information. But his captor is not at all who-or what- he thought they would be. Lots of humor, uses some chaacters from my other fanfics. EnvyxOC, possible ScarxOC, KimbleexOC
1. Chapter 1

_Background:_

_Shonan and hay-Lin are in the FMA world, Shonan's 18, Hay-Lin's 19. No Akatsuki, Espadas, or anyone else from the Chaos series. Just those two, Chi, and Dijira. However, they do keep their ablilities and most of their backgrounds. They travel around with Ed and Al, but have lately settled in Central Headquarters to bug Mustang and do a few scattered jobs. Very few people are aware of who- or _what_- Shonan and Hay-Lin are. Those people are Roy, Ed, Al, and Lt. Hawkeye. Shonan typically stays in a cell, like the prisoners, but treated much better, in her free time to pass the time without annoying anyone. Mustang sometimes condemned criminals down to her cell to be tortured- either physically or mentally. Sometimes psychologically._

**Ch.1**

"Shonan, you've got a new roommate!" Hay-Lin yelled, leading a very unhappy-looking green-haired person down to the prison cell where Shonan was wasting time on her iPod. Well, Dijira's iPod, anyways. She had just been down visiting Shonan and let Shonan borrow the 'wondrous device of temple run' as Shonan liked calling it.

"Really!" Shonan cried eagerly, jumping to the bars. Hay-Lin wondered how much sugar she'd had that day. She shrugged the thought off. It would just torture the victim more. Shonan paused, taking in her new 'roommate'. They wore a black headband with a red upside-down triangle, and their hair reminded her of a pineapple. They also donned a black top that exposed their navel, handgloves, and shorts with a skirt-like appendage, with a tattoo on their leg. Shonan frowned in disgust. "Jeez, what a girl! You could've at least brought me a guy to torture! They go insane a lot faster and are fun to toy with! But nooo, you just _had_ to go and capture a girl!" she complained. The prisoner narrowed their eyes and growled.

"I _am _ a guy, you idiot." Hay-Lin whistled innocently and shoved the prisoner inside Shonan's cell. Then she left.

"Really? Well, judging by your voice…speaking which, you sound like you swallowed a damn frog! Here, have some water!" said Shonan, chucking a glass of water that was sitting on the small table beside her bed at his face (Of course, it's a short table. It has to be. Just don't tell her that).

"Why you little…" Shonan's eyes snapped to her victim, and she smiled sweetly. Too sweetly to be safe.

"Tell me, what's your name? Where I come from it is courteous to know the name of the one you killed."

"Like you could kill me. My name's Envy, shrimp."

"Shrimp? Where! Give it to me! Wait, Envy? No _wonder_ you seemed sorta familiar! You're one of those homo…homus….ho…huh? Well, you're one of those things people always mistake me for that Ed's always talking about!"

"Homunculus?" supplied Envy.

"Yeah! That's the one! No, but seriously, girly. You need to get something for your throat. It seriously makes me think you swallowed a frog whole."

"Will you drop it already?"

"nope! HEY! Do you know Steve!" Shonan cried out, excited. Who knows, maybe she'll explode.

"What? Who's Steve?" Shonan grinned.

"HE'S MADE OF BUNNIES!" She cried out, laughing. "No, but seriously! He's so soft! Feel!" she cried, shoving a ball of angora wool in Envy's face.

"Wha?" exclaimed a very flustered and confused Envy.

"He's jus like an alpaca…" murmured Shonan. She perked up again and threw 'Steve' in a box across the room. She went over to Envy and frowned. "Bend down" she ordered. Envy, confused, did what she said. She stared him in the eyes for a full minute, at which he began feeling uncomfortable. The only one who'd ever gotten so close (proximity wise) to him without being injured was Lust…Suddenly, Shonan broke out into a wide grin and brought her hand up, accidently whacking Envy in the nose. "I GOT JINGLY BELLS!" she cried, laughing and running around, exited. Indeed, there was a bell tied to her wrist like a bracelet. She'd have to thank Diji for all this stuff later. Especially the box of Oreos! Envy fell back and sat on the ground, gingerly massaging his bruised nose.

"That hurt, you little brat." He said.

"Little?" Shonan questioned. "Do you have a death wish or something? I'd hate to go against Colonel (pronounced call-o-nell) Pony and Horse-girl's orders not to kill you, but…

"Colonel Pony?" interrupted Envy. Shonan paused for a moment.

"Roy Mustang" she explained briefly, then continuing on with her rant. Envy snickered. He'd have to remember that one. _Is this girl even human? _He wondered. He then decided that no human could be so crazy.

"Girl." He interrupted again.

"What?" she snapped irritably. She had just begun telling him about how she almost set her house on fire by making cereal!

"What's your name? I'm not sure how long I'm going to have to stay here, so I may as well learn my captor's name. And species." He added.

"I'm Shonan. You finally figured out I'm not a stupid human, huh? Usually takes people longer. But yeah, I'm half-cat. Before you ask, I'm not a chimera, either. It's natural, by blood. There _is _a reason, but I'm not telling you until I truest you more." She said, relieved to be able to revert to her half-form again. She checked her watch. "Eep! I'm late! Colonel pony's gonna kill me! I'll be back, 'kay roomie? I'll leave a shadow clone to guard you." Said Shonan, doing just as she said. Envy stared in wonder at the clone, then asked wondrously,

"Can I poke it?" Shonan laughed at his curiosity.

"Sure!" then she left to go se Mustang. Once she entered his office, she slunk to a chair under the intense glared of Mustang, her sister, and the other high-ranking officers from Central. She was now back to her human form, since not everyone knew of her abilities.

"So, how's your new 'roommate?" Mustang asked coldly. Shonan perked up.

"He…She…It..yeah, it works, it's fine, Colonel Pony! I even let him meet Steve!" she said happily. Hay-Lin facepalmed. Oh, the stupidity. _ Let's hope it's not contagious…_she thought.

"It's Colonel (pronounced kernel) Mustang, to you." Mustang glared.

"Nooo, It's Colonel Pony! You should know how to pronounce your own name, stupid." Retorted Shonan. Mustang ground his teeth irritably.

"Well, that matter aside, We've deemed to let you torture Envy psychologically until he finally gives in to the torture and gives us the information we want. We'll take him away for physical torture from noon to three every weekday until he gives in. Can you handle that?" Mustang asked.

"Sure! But…what'll happen if he gives in to you people?" she asked.

"Then you have our permission to kill him. He would no longer be necessary." Replied the Iron-Blood Alchemist. Shonan was quiet for a few moments.

"M-kay! Can I get back to my palm tree friendly now?" she asked.

"sure…" said Mustang, not quite sure how to respond. Slowly, everyone left until only Mustang, Lt. Hawkeye, and hay-Lin were left, discussing military tactics, the homunculi, and other important matters.

Shonan turned into her cat form and slipped through the bars to her cell, where she reverted to her half-form. "I'm back!" she said, skipping over to Envy, who was laying on the bed opposite of hers, who opened one eye to see what the commotion was about. His eyes widened in surprise as she shoved a glass full of water in his mouth. "drink" she ordered. Having no choice, Envy did just that. Annoying human. Once he swallowed, he sat up.

"What the hell!"

"I needed to water the palm tree. Besides, what did I say about your voice? You need water." Shonan huffed. Envy glared at her. He would enjoy killing her once he was free.

**A/N: I know it's short and not very good, but I was writing this off the top of my head, plus i'd come up with it a few hours ago. This was largely based off of some things I did on Friday, namely Steve, Diji's iPod, and the bells. Bell. Singular. Also, Today I heard Envy's English voice in the original Fullmetal Alchemist, and I plan on using that new information in the next chapter. To Explain Shonan and Hay-lin, as well as their personalities, appearances, etc, they're in my other fanfic, Chaos and How to Survive It. I'll start actually writing this down on paper today, so I'll be able to keep my idas.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Ch. 2**

"So…how'd you get here?" Shonan motioned to the cell, which didn't look that much like a prison cell at all, since it had windows, light, color, and two rooms (main room and bathroom), "anyways?"

"That Flame alchemist bastard caught me by surprise and knocked me unconscious. That coward. When I woke up, I was tied up with chains, ropes, locks, and anything else they could use."

"Then couldn't you escape from here?" Shonan asked.

"This place is on heavy surveillance, including you, the warden, armed guards, and security cameras. If I went somewhere, I'd be caught within seconds. My abilities are useless here. If I'm constantly being watched, they'll know if I transform. I can't escape." Shonan nodded, only half-listening.

"M-hm. Hey, can I ask you a question?"

"What?" asked Envy suspiciously.

"I know that you can shapeshift into creatures larger than yourself, but can you turn into something small, say, a mouse for example?"

"Of course!" said Envy, protecting his wounded pride and ego. He morphed into a mouse. Shonan picked him up, somewhat roughly.

"Aww! You're so cute! Look at those tiny paws! So cute! And small! And edible!" a look of slight panic entered Envy's eyes. Was he going to die like this! Unfortunately, he couldn't transform because Shonan was holding onto a vital pressure. He felt a bit light-headed…"I finally found someone older than me that's shorter than me! Woo!" Envy snapped to attention and squirmed around in Shonan's grasp, falling to the floor and returning to his normal form.

"Really!" he yelled, fuming. "If you wanted to see someone shorter than you, you could've just asked me to turn into a little kid or something! I thought you were gonna eat me for a second!" he exploded.

"While it is true you certainly act the part, I'm afraid a human child would've been taller than my cat form." Shonan stated.

"Anyways," said Envy, brushing off the insult, "How'd _you_ get here? You're my captor, guard, and warden, you shouldn't be in the cell with the prisoner."

"This is basically my room. That's why it's not so prison-ey. Besides, I live for the dark. I've always wanted to see what living in a prison cell would be like! So, Hay-Lin, the fuhrer, and Colonel Pony decided to let me have this place as a room to keep me out of trouble in exchange for me helping them torture and/or dispose of condemned criminals. It works. I get well-fed in the process, too! The fish they serve are phenomenal!" Envy looked a bit doubtful.

"No, I mean how'd you become a dog of the military?" Shonan stiffened.

"Okay, A, I'm not a fucking canine, B, I'm not an alchemist, and C, I'm not part of the military, and neither is my sister. We're simply allied with them, but we work for ourselves, not unlike the Fullmetal pipsqueak. Oh, and also, this is for earlier." Said Shonan coldly, suddenly whipping around and punching Envy in the face, sending him crashing into the wall with a sickening thud. Envy looked up at her, confused. "You're a pathetic excuse for a guy, especially if you're supposedly evil. What kind of wimp would give up so easily? You say you can't escape, then try to find different ways to escape! You've got your entire life ahead of you, so don't give up and die now! Don't you want to be free? To taste the sweet air again? To go back to your allies? To escape this goddamned hellhole? Are you just some sissy girl who'll sit around and accept death? No! Don't stay locked up in the confines of the possible!" Shonan yelled.

"Soo…you're gonna help me escape?" Envy coughed out.

"Aw, hell no. I'm keeping you under close watch, as ordered. That was just to motivate you. And if you wanna fight me, go ahead, but I'll win for sure. I'm glad to finally have a roommate that doesn't look at me in vulgar ways or try to molest me." She said matter-of-factly.

"Haven't you had girl 'roommates' before?" asked Envy, partially afraid of the answer.

"Your point?" said Shonan with a straight face. Envy looked disgusted.

"Ugh, it was that bad, huh?"

"Yep. Speaking of which, are you sure you're a guy? Apparently the frog left your throat because it was actually a toad and didn't like the water, and now you sound even _more_ like a girl!" Shonan snickered, evading Envy's rage-guided punch.

"I'm a guy and I can prove it!" yelled Envy. Shonan smirked. Game, set, match.

"Are you sure? You've got long hair like a girl, you sound like a girl, however, you _are_ rather flat-chested…meh, the odds are against you, homo."

"Homo?" growled Envy dangerously.

"Uh-huh! Since I can't pronounce your species, I'll call you homos. Besides, you personally look like you could be either homo or bi. I'm not quite sure…You could also be a queer or transevite, I've heard those words too…I'll call you what I wish, kay?" Envy growled in rage, but Shonan continued anyways. "What is Envy? A he, she, or it? Oh! A shim! Wait, but that still leaves the 'it'…oh! Perfect! Envy! You're a shit!" she exclaimed, elated with her profound discovery.

"I'll kill you. I swear, I'll kill you…" Envy growled.

"Yeah right! Trying to kill me is like trying to separate two electromagnets! Impossible! Now quiet down, the food's here!" As if on cue, a guard brought down a cart with three shelves that were positively packed with food. He was moving the cart with one hand, and in the other sat a dull gray tray with a chipped and shabby-looking bowl of an unidentified food and a piece of stale bread. Envy's stomach growled at the thought of so much food. _Maybe being in the same cell as this idiot has its perks after all…_he thought. The guard unlocked the cell and pushed the cart in, where Shonan was waiting.

"This is for you, and this," said the guard, handing her the small tray,"is for the prisoner."

_"WHAT!" _cried Envy in disbelief.

"Be grateful you anything at all, scum." said the guard coldly, locking the cell and leaving.

"Just quit complaining and eat it." said Shonan, feasting on a drumstick and enjoying every last bite.

"Can't I have something from your cart instead?" asked Envy. Shonan's turned ice cold.

"Listen here, cross dresser. Taking my food is a worse offense than calling me short, you hear? So lay off it. I'll leave something here overnight, and if it's still there in the morning, untouched, then I'll give you something tomorrow." Envy nodded, slightly intimidated, and quickly ate his 'food'. He spat it out after the first bite though, because it was old, moldy, and tasted what he imagined a foot would taste like. He'd have to ask Gluttony when he got out.

Envy lay on his bed/cot thing, his stomach growling like a ravenous lion. How come that girl, Shonan, got all the luxurious items? She couldn't be _that_ special. Hasn't she ever heard of equal treatment? Then again, he was one to talk…_I guess I'm getting a taste of my own medicine…_he thought. The smell of the roasted salmon resting on the cart wafted over to his nose. He couldn't take it anymore. It was too much. He jumped off the bed and ran to the cart, devouring the fish in seconds like a starved animal. Then, he plopped back on the bed, content and with a somewhat fuller stomach than before and fell asleep.

Envy woke up and tried to stretch his arms, but found something restraining him. He opened his eyes and found himself duct taped and superguled to his bed.

"What the?" he asked, bewildered at this phenomenon.

"Thou hast eaten the fish, and so thou shall be punished." Said Shonan medievaly, sitting on the second bunk of her bed, arms and legs crossed, looking down at Envy.

"Shonan, we've come for En…vy…_what_ did you do?" said Hay-Lin, striding down the hallway but stopping when she saw Envy's predicament.

"He hath eaten the fish, so I bestowed upon myself the honor of punishing this evildoer."

"Aren't you one of those crack-of-noon types?"

"That I am, fair sister. However, I felt an overwhelming urge to check on my _Oncorhynchus masou masou __and see if it was still within out fair existence. But alas, it was gone. Vanished."_

_ "Okay…well, we'll be going now. Guards, fetch Envy." Two guards entered the hall, unlocked the cell, and took Envy, still duct taped, out of the cell, although they had some difficulty un-gluing him. Hay-Lin stayed behind until they were gone. "Hey, Shonan, why don't you come upstairs, to civilization, and talk to the others?" she asked._

_ "Cause you told me to guard the palm tree."_

_ "Well, he's gonna be gone for three hours, so you have time. Honestly, use what little common sense you actually have. Come, the others are waiting on the rooftop, getting fresh air and sunlight."_

_ "m-kay!" cried Shonan, bounding off after her sister. When she got to the roof, she saw Dijira and Chi, her friends, pointing down to the street and making fun of the people there. "'Ello everyone!" she said, sitting down next to Chi._

_ "Hello, shortstack!" smirked Dijira. Chi had to restrain Shonan and keep her from killing Dijira._

_ "Shut it Kira, let go Chi." growled Shonan._

_ "Nope. Diji's a good kid. I want her alive. 'Sides, I got a magnet." said Chi._

_ "Sweet. Gimme it."_

_ "Are you gonna use it? Or store it in that high bunk in your 'room'?" asked Chi._

_ "Both, in that order." answered Shonan. Chi gave her the magnet. Shonan began clinging to it, then, very inconspicuously pointed it at Dijira, who was laying on the roof, looking at the clouds._

_ "Why do you store all that random shit in that bunk anyways?" asked Chi as Dijira struggled against the force of Shonan's magnet._

_ "Cause it's hollow and most people can't reach it"_

_ "Oh and you can? You're even more vertically challenged than most people!" Chi scoffed._

_ "Whatever that means…I jump up. I can jump really high up to compensate for my lack of…well, you know." said Shonan, raising her hand above her head to indicate height._

_ "Dammit! Get that thing off my face!" cried Dijira, the magnet stuck to her cheek, which looked pretty painful._

"Sorry!" said Shonan, sending a light electric charge through the magnet to disable it. Then, she put it inside the small case/pouch/bag (1) that she carries around with her that's attached to her belt for later. "Imana go make a cave! I'm pretty sure there's two more bunks under my storage one! One can be a sentry post, the other, my cave! This'll be fun! I've always wanted to try this…I'll even be able to be taller than Envy!" she said, running off. Shonan's 'cave' is basically just a bunk, but there's extra sheets hanging down from the frame of the bunk above it that reach down to the floor, creating a makeshift cave. Once Shonan was done setting up her new 'hideout', she decided to go take a shower.

The guards unlocked the cell and shoved Envy inside. It was at times like this that he was glad he had his regenerative abilities. He stretched out and cracked his knuckles, popping his shoulder back into place. A nice, warm shower would feel really good right about now, especially to help relax his aching muscles. He went to open the door that lead to the bathroom. That's strange, it was locked_…Oh well, I'll just have to break it down._ he thought.

Shonan stepped out of the shower and wrapper herself in a fluffy white towel. _Hot water sure fells nice!...Even though it's about 70 degrees outside…in the winter…ah, whatever!_ she thought, shaking the water out of her ears and tail. As she was brushing her hair, which helped dry it faster, the door suddenly splintered and broke with a loud crack, Envy stumbling in with it. Shonan was frozen in shock and surprise for a moment, but almost immediately, her eyes took on a demonic quality, her ears and tail transformed into Demon Kitty/Chi's ears and tail, and her hair darkened. She quickly spun around and threw a sharpened double-bladed battle ax at a terrified Envy, the ax passing over his head by only a micrometer. _**"Envy…"**_ growled Shonan, a dark aura, red and black in color, radiating off her, _**"Run. If you value your life at all, then run. I will not spare your meager life if this happens again. Hell, I might not even spare you now!"**_ Two dark, intricate, spiral-shaped markings, seals it seemed, appeared on her shoulders.

"I-it wasn't on purpose!" Envy yelped, surprised that the hyperactive idiot that he had to put up with could turn into this demonic beast.

"Then what was it?" Shonan growled.

"I just got back from the interrogation from hell and decided to take a shower!"

"Locks exist for a reason!" Shonan yelled.

"I thought you were playing some kinda sick trick! It seems right up your alley!" Envy yelled back, his confidence slowly returning.

"That's a good idea…" said Shonan, some of her former, more hyper self shining through a bit, "But no! You moron, if I wasn't in the room and the door was locked, then what could you possibly come up with? I left? I would never leave a dangerous convict alone in my room! Hell, I'd never let a dangerous convict in my room at all, if I had a choice in the matter. Which I didn't." murmured Shonan, a bit calmer now, and back to her former ears and tail, her hair went back to its former electric-blue color, and the seals on her shoulders vanished. "Here, take a shower. I'll go get changed, then call my sister to fix the door." Shonan said quietly, picking up her surprisingly neatly folded clothes and katana, and then entering her 'cave' to change. Envy looked on with light guilt, but shrugged off the bothersome emotion.

**footnotes: (1) it's her little poch thing that she hangs on her belt, almost like a bag of sorts? but smaller/ here, look at these for an idea...: .com/art/Shonan-at-the-Beach-290495615, (barely visible, but still...) .com/art/Hangliding-Trip-Shonan-Style-275817369?q=gallery%3Aannadrujok%2F33340629&qo=31**

**A/N: a lot longer than the first chapter! hooray! If you go to my deviantart page (link on my profile), I have ome art from this fic. In fact, most of my fanfics themselves are on DA... I hope you like! Review please! reviews=inpiration=more writing/typing=faster updates!**


	3. Chapter 3

**REALLY IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOTE, please read! **

**A/N: Okay, so I have a little Q and A for you guys to answer any confusion.**

**Q: where in the timeline does this take place?**

**A: I honesly have no idea. I'm just drawing from random tidbits on information I have, and using what/whoever will suit me the best ina situation (like Brigadeer General Grande, for example). Al is still a tin can, though, so it's not really at the end of the series...think of this story as a filler arc, almost...**

**Q: is this in the manga, 2003 anime, or brotherhood?**

**A: a mix of the manga, since it was epic, and the 2003 anime, since there are some things there that i liked a lot more than the manga, or just a bit more. I haven't watched brotherhood yet, so don't even think about it when reading this.**

**Q: which homunculi are you using?**

**A: from the manga: Wrath, Pride, Envy, Lust, Gluttony, Greed/Lingreed. from the 2003 anime: Sloth, Greed, Envy (I'm sticking with the manga way of creating homos. I hated that 'homunculi are made from failed human transmutation' shit.), Lust, Gluttony, and Wrath gets mentioned.**

**Q: I'm confused. who's dead? and why is so an so alive?**

**A: Who's definately dead/nonexistant: Shou Tucker, Frank Archer never existed, Dante never existed, the Fullmetal Fakers (I forget their names...the plant alchemy ones, red water related, anime only...) who's alive/existant, by some turn of events even I didn't know about: the Iron-Blood Alchemist, May-Chang, Ling and his bodyguards, Father, well...all the manga people are here...Hughes might be alive. Tell me what you think, should I include him? **

**Ch. 3**

Hay-Lin sat in Mustang's office, looking through a manila folder labeled 'classified'. "So you want me to go after this Scar fellow, huh? Isn't he that serial killer person that's always on the news?" she asked.

"Correct. He has been targeting state alchemists, and he is quickly becoming a big problem, especially with the homunculi we already have to worry about. Since you're not an alchemist or in the military, he'll never suspect or target you. You could easily launch a surprise attack. Your unique abilities allow you to do everything an alchemist can and more, so you are perfect for the job." replied Mustang.

"His way of killing certainly is…unique…you _are_ aware that I'm not immortal like my sister, right?" said Hay-Lin.

"Then you'll just have to be extra careful. All of that information, his battle strategies and everything else, are all information that was gathered by the Elric brothers' firsthand experience. Who knows, you might run into them on your mission. Do you think you could do it?"

"of course, just tell me where to begin searching. You'll have his head before the week is up." said Hay-Lin, closing the folder.

"You sound like an assassin…Our sources tell us that Scar was last seen near Resembool, where the Elric brothers have been for the past week, getting automail and armor repairs."

"I see, I'll head out immediately." said Hay-Lin, nodding and heading out the door. She sighed and went down to Shonan's cell. She unlocked it, and then entered. Envy, who was laying on his bed, looked up to see who it was, then lay back down with a 'hmph'. Hay-Lin looked around, not seeing her sister. Knowing her, she'd probably be somewhere high up or isolated…Hay-Lin looked around, then saw the 'cave'. She pulled aside one of the sheets and almost immediately got hissed at by a rabid Shonan, who was shrinking back from the sudden light.

"Oh, it's you…whaddaya want, teme?" asked Shonan, calming down a bit. Hay-Lin ignored her insult. It's become more of a nickname than an insult.

"I'm going to have to leave on a mission soon. I won't be gone for more than a week, so fend for yourself until then. That means a lot less food. You can go hunting or something, but stay out of trouble. Please, _please_, stay. out. of. trouble. If I hear from Mustang that you blew something up or worse, lost the prisoner, however unlikely that may be, I'll pin your head to a display case where you can complain all you want for the next century." Shonan gulped and put a hand over her throat, making sure it was still there.

"Understood." Hay-Lin nodded, then handed Shonan something. _For the prisoner._ she said via. telepathy. Shonan looked at it. It was a black choker, similar to hers. Shonan nodded, taking the choker, and Hay-Lin left.

"What's that?" Envy asked, rolling over to face Shonan.

"A present." She responded.

"For?"

"You."

"Keep it."

"M-kay! I will!" said Shonan, climbing up to her storage bunk.

"Wait, what? Gimme that, you brat!" cried Envy. Shonan stuck out her tongue, perching on her hollowed out bunk.

"Gonna have to take it from me, Shorty!" Envy shapeshifted into an 8 foot tall version of himself.

"Who's short now?" he snarled, ripping the choker from Shonan's grip.

"eep!" In panic, Shonan went back to her cat form, covering her head with her paws and trembling. As soon as she was sure Envy couldn't see her, she grinned. Her genius plan worked.

"What the hell is this thing, anyways?" Envy growled, now back at his normal height.

"A-a choker, your palm tree-ness!" Shonan squeaked, hiding a laugh.

"Come down here and tell me how to use it, insolent brat." Envy growled. Shonan jumped down from her bunk (which is 7 ft, above ground, by the way) and reverted to her half-form.

"here, sit on the edge of your bed." she ordered, taking the choker from Envy. Envy scowled, but did what she said. Shonan then crawled on the bed and kneeled down behind him and brushed some of his ridiculously long hair back so that she could fasten the clasp on the back of his neck. Shonan gasped suddenly. There was a large scar on Envy's neck, possibly very deep, considering that it existed at all.

"What is it now?" Envy snapped irritably.

"there's a scar on the back of your neck!" Shonan gasped.

"Oh, that thing. I'd forgotten about that. That's from the war at Ishbal."

"The war at Ishbal?" Shonan asked, genuinely curious.

"You've gotta be kidding. You must be the only person that's never heard of the war. It was a bloody massacre. The Ishbalans got slaughtered by the military, because the military decided it was taking too long to end the uprising, and so they brought I their ultimate weapon – the state alchemists. Everyone was slaughtered in a single night. It had started as a civil uprising, but war broke out when a military officer shot and killed an Ishbalan child. It was one of the bloodiest massacres in the history of Amestris, and I started it." Envy said proudly.

"You were in the military?" Shonan asked, closing the choker's clasp behind Envy's neck.

"No, you idiot, I shapeshifted into one of the officers, Juliet Douglass, to be exact." _Ha,_ _even when he shapeshifts, he turns into a girl!_ Shonan thought, laughing silently.

"oh." said Shonan. "Wait a second." Shonan got up and went to her bed. She materialized a ladder(tool) and leaned it on her bed so that it reached the top bunk. She climbed up and got a hairbrush from the top bunk, then climbed back down. She made her way to her previous post and began brushing Envy's hair.

"What the hell are you doing?" Envy asked irritably.

"Brushing your hair. It may look sleek and straight, but it's actually really knotted. You should take better care of your hair." Shonan replied. Envy scowled.

"I don't care what you think." He growled, but he let her continue brushing out the knots in his hair. They continued like that for half-an-hour, at which point Shonan managed to untangle Envy's hair and began just running the brush through it. Envy relaxed at that point, enjoying the sensation of the brush running through his hair and eventually falling asleep. Shonan smiled softly, proud to have tamed that savage beast. For the time being, anyway. She then retreated to her cave and went to sleep.

"Oi, sleepy cat! Wake up!" Dijira whispered, pulling aside the sheets in Shonan's cave and shaking her awake.

"Whaaat?" Shonan groaned, still half-asleep.

"Shh, your victim's asleep. Let's mess around with him." Dijira told her. Shonan's eyes brightened and she was instantly wide awake.

"Whaddaya need? Shonan asked, eagerly climbing up to the top bunk.

"Markers, pens, sharpies, glue, glitter, whipped cream, a camera, a feather, a few bows, and…a red panda." Shonan tossed said items to Dijira as she listed them, but stopped when Dijira said 'red panda' and gave her a wtf look. Dijira shrugged, and then said "you might get hungry…" Shonan nodded and threw her a random red panda that no one even knew she had. "Oh, and some duct tape, too!" Shonan grabbed it and climbed down to where Dijira was. Then, they snuck over to Envy's bed, where he was soundly sleeping, despite all the ruckus, and prepared their artillery. Over the course of two hours, they decorated Envy from head to toe, covering him with various designs, patterns, drawings, and glitter. Even in his hair. Everything, from stars and hearts to ponies and rainbows, even fake mustaches adorned Envy when they were done. Dijira pointed at the drawn-on mustache and mouthed the words 'feel like a sir' to Shonan, who snickered quietly. They snapped a photo and put everything away, except for the red panda, which Dijira decided to keep and name Pancake.

"What's all this for?" Shonan asked quietly.

"First day of Spring!" Dijira whispered happily.

"Sweet! I won't have to sleep until Summer!(1)" Shonan celebrated. Dijira nodded. Poor Envy, to have to put up with that for a whole season…Then again, he _was _a prisoner…Ha, he deserves this. Shonan looked at the clock on the wall. "Almost noon. If you see Chi on your way out, tell her I'm taking a shower and be out soon. Knowing her, she'll be waiting in my cave, as always…I hope she doesn't ruin anything…" Shonan fretted. Unbeknownst to them, however, Envy had just woken up, but managed to hear about Chi. He now had and escape route. Dijira left and Shonan entered the bathroom, locking the door. As soon as they were gone, Envy yawned and sat up, pretending to have been asleep. He feigned curiosity and entered Shonan's cave. He was amazed. It seemed enormous on the inside! Shelves, a window, various drawings, books, and…more duct tape? Damn, that girl must have an obsession with the stuff or something. Either way, he could use that. Soon, a black-and-red haired girl, her hair in a ponytail, entered the cell. She had a jaguar print shirt (like Winry's), skirt (torn at the edges), and armbands, along with black fingerless gloves, as well as a choker and belt, which had a red skull as some sort of odd buckle. She also had cat ears and tail, like Shonan, but they were more ragged and savage, not to mention they were black as night with blood red spots. _This must be Chi…_Envy thought.

"And so, the fearless Demon Girl enters the lair of her noble tyrant queen…wait, Demon girl…that's sorta redundant, isn't it? It's like saying three-pronged trident…" Chi said, pausing. She shrugged it off and continued on her merry way. Sure enough, Chi made her way to the 'cave', where Envy was lying in wait. As soon as Chi was inside, Envy put his hand over her mouth and pinned her wrists behind her back.

"Not one word, you hear?" he hissed. Chi began to struggle and shout, but her efforts were futile, since Shonan couldn't hear anything over the sound of the shower, and Envy easily overpowered her. Damn, without full mobility and blood nearby(2), she was helpless! She was soon fully bound in duct tape so that she couldn't escape. Envy then took her form and exited the cave, appearing to be freaked out or slightly afraid. "What was that freak doing in Shonan's cave?" He cried to keep up appearance, climbing up to the second bunk. Soon, Shonan came out of the bathroom, fully clothed minus her katana and choker, which she was putting on now. Her hair was still dripping wet, though.

"Heya Chi! Did the guards already get the palm tree out of here?"

"Yeah, I watched them drag that scumbag away." Envy lied, his pride a bit hurt at having to insult himself. It was actually a Saturday, so he didn't need to be interrogated.

"Kay then, let's go! Diji should be waiting for us on the roof. We're water ballooning the military today!"

"Sweet, sounds like fun!" Indeed, it did sound like fun, but that was the least of his concerns a the time. Just two and a half more hours till escape.

"Okay, so here's the rules, maggots." Barked Dijira, dressed in a military outfit with a whistle and clipboard as she tossed a water balloon in her hand that wasn't holding the clipboard. "You're gonna take a water balloon, aim for one of my comrades, and once they're within range, you'll fire. Is that clear?" she asked. Shonan nodded, as did Envy. "I said…_IS THAT CLEAR, SOLDIER?" _Dijira yelled, a vein popping in her neck.

"Sir, yes sir!" Shonan and Envy cried in unison, saluting, startled.

""good." Said Dijira. "Whoever hits the most officers wins. The higher rank, the more points you get. If they see you, subtract five points. You have now entered Fuhrer Dijira's Balloon Boot Camp from Hell. Welcome, and I'll see you on the other side. Any objections? No? I thought so. Ready? BEGIN!" she cried, chucking her balloon off the roof. "duck!" She cried. Everyone ducked. Seconds later, they heard a loud splat.

"HEY!" someone yelled. Dijira chuckled. After a few more seconds, they got back up. Envy eyed Dijira strangely. She hadn't even looked down a the street, but she had hit her mark…what was she hiding?

"Hey Chi, what's wrong?" Shonan asked.

"Wh-oh, nothing, nothing!" Envy replied, momentarily forgetting his disguise. He went to the giant 20 gallon bucket where the water balloons were and got a few. Then, he made his way to the edge of the roof. Lt. Hawkeye was passing on the street below. Envy aimed carefully, then chucked the balloon down at her with all his might and ducked. Death by water balloon, he hoped. But even if the Lt. didn't die, he would have a fun game. Her cry of distress at getting water in her uniform was all that was needed to convince Envy that this game could be much more fun than he'd hoped.

"Nice one, Chi!" Shonan congratulated him, high-fiving him. After about an hour and a half of chucking water balloons at the military, Envy suddenly felt a water balloon hit the back of his head. "What the? Who threw that?" he yelled angrily, whipping around. Shonan burst out in a fit of laughter. Dijira chucked another balloon at his face, and then joined Shonan in laughing. "Oh, it's on now…" he growled, surprisingly in character. He picked up a water balloon and threw it at Shonan, who gaped in shock when it hit its mark, but quickly recovered, throwing another balloon at 'Chi'. Soon, it was a full scale water balloon war. Sometime near the end, Envy tossed a balloon at Dijira, the last one. No one had thrown one at her, so he decided to be the first. Dijira twitched, then, all of a sudden, grabbed the now empty balloon bucket.

"I has a bucket!" she cried, putting the bucket on her head. And so the craziness continued, Shonan and Dijira being the main contributors. After a while, they all got tired and collapsed on the floor, laughing. Who knew the pipsqueak could be so much fun to be around? If she was like this in the cell…

"Aww, it's 3 already!" said Shonan sadly. "I guess I have to go back to guarding that stupid palm tree…he probably wouldn't be such a prick if he could come outside from time to time…he'd probably enjoy this…But he can't, since he just _had_ to be a 'dangerous criminal'. So of course, the stuck-up military won't give him even an ounce of freedom. At least he's fun to annoy…makes for good entertainment, but he's too easily agitated. Fun for a while, but sometimes its fun to just poke someone for hours and hours 'till the splode…"

"Till they pop!" Dijira put in happily.

"Exactly!" said Shonan. "Well, I gotta go now…bye everyone!" she said, descending down the staircase back to her 'room'.

"You. You're not Chi…are you? I can't…tell…my mind's all fuzzy…stupid human eyes…blur so easy…even if you are Chi…you must die. Then, I'll know for sure…" Envy turned around quickly, only to see Dijira making her way towards him, eyes red. Nervously, he raised his arms in front of him. How had she found out?

"N-nice Dijira…" he said, slowly reaching for the hose behind him. As soon as his hand touched it, he grabbed it and sprayed Dijira with a stream of water. "Take that!" Dijira collapsed on the ground, twitching, the blue orbs on her fingerless gloves and the gear on her chest sparking occasionally. Envy took this opportunity to jump down onto the balcony from the floor below, shapeshift to look like a normal human, and escape. Finally, he was free.

Hay-Lin pushed aside some cobwebs in the doorway. According to the villagers, a man with a x-shaped scar and white hair had started living here a few days ago. It was an old abandoned building that may or may not have been a house at some time. Her footsteps echoed loudly through the halls and rooms, creating an eerie effect. She came to a large open room. There had been a faint energy radiating from that room. It could've easily been a mouse, but then again, she had to take into consideration that these people have incredibly weak auras…

"Who's there? Show yourself!" a voice asked boldly. A dark-skinned man with white hair and red eyes stepped out of the shadows. He also had a large, x-shaped scar on his face. He didn't seem incredibly old, though. If she had to guess, she would probably say he was in his early twenties or so…Hay-Lin caught sight of the man's right arm, which had a large, intricate tattoo on it, and her suspicions were confirmed.

"Scar…"

**FOOTNOTES:**

(1) "I won't have to sleep until Summer!"- Just in case someone didn't know, Shonan can't (as in it's impossible for her) sleep in the Spring and Autumn. To make up for that, though, she sleeps like a frickin rock in the Summer and Winter. It comes with her being half-cat.

(2) "without blood nearby, she was helpless" – Chi is a blood demon, so her element is blood. She can freely control it, morph it, and make it into anything she wants, because of that. All beasts have an elelment, or something they can control. Some are cliché, like wind, water, earth, fire, ice etc, but some are odd, like shadows, blood, minerals, etc.

**A/N: *flinches* you guys probally wanna kill me for being so late with this, huh? Well, I do have reasons. School, after-school commitments, DA, and how pretty google images can be! Plus my starnge ability to push off/not want to do things with priority that i should do, even if its homework and the computer was unlocked. Damn, this that/this thing's really distracting! So, sorry! A comment/review (since I'm putting the same authors note in both DA and Fanfic) would be much appreciated! thanks! Oh! Almost forgot! I'm finishing up the cover for this story! I just have to outline and color it! You'll know when its up, I'll tell you people in the next author's note/you'll see it when I upload the next chapter (or if you have me on your +watch, It'll be its own deviation!) Bye!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Ch. 4**

_-recap-_

Hay-Lin pushed aside some cobwebs in the doorway. According to the villagers, a man with a x-shaped scar and white hair had started living here a few days ago. It was an old abandoned building that mmay or may not have been a house at some time. Her footsteps echoed loudly through the halls and rooms, creating an eerie effect. She came to a large open room. There had been a faint energy radiating from that room. It could've easily been a mouse, but then again, she had to take into consideration that these people have incredibly weak auras…

"Who's there? Show yourself!" a voice asked boldly. A dark-skinned man with white hair and red eyes stepped out of the shadows. He also had a large, x-shaped scar on his face. He didn't seem incredibly old, though. If she had to guess, she would probably say he was in his early to mid twenties or so…Hay-Lin caught sight of the man's right arm, which had a large, intricate tattoo on it, and her suspicions were confirmed.

"Scar…"

The Ishbalan man tensed.

"Who are you?" he asked. "A bounty hunter? Or are you a state alchemist?"

"Neither." Hay-Lin responded. "My name is Hay-Lin Nazo. I am here to end you murder streak. I was sent here by Colonel Roy Mustang, the Flame Alchemist." she said boldly.

"An ally of the military? Then _die!_" Scar shouted, running towards Hay-Lin, right arm at the ready. Hay-Lin stood in place, waiting for just the right moment. If her timing was off by even a second, she would die. She kept waiting until Scar's arm was inches from her face, when she suddenly teleported behind him, discreetly hitting a pressure point. Scar stumbled forward slightly, off balance and surprised, but quickly regained his footing. "What are you?" he growled.

"I'm not a homunculus, if that's what you're thinking. I'm just a human named Hay-Lin. I already told you, remember? However, no one said I'm normal." said Hay-Lin, calmly pulling a dagger with a beautiful purple quartz pommel stone out of her purse, the famed "endless bag". Scar frowned. Suddenly, hay-Lin teleported behind him to cut his arm with the dagger, but he was expecting her and grabbed her arm. She couldn't escape, and before she could figure out how, Scar blew up her arm with his destructive alchemy. She gasped in pain and jumped away. Hay-Lin pressed a hand to her new stump of an arm, her hand beginning to glow green with her healing abilities, stopping the blood flow. As she was doing this, she prepared a regeneration technique she had seen before. A golden light encased the area where her arm used to be and it began to regenerate. _Well, that's the last time I'll be able to use that technique…it took up too much energy…I'll just have to be more careful from now on… _she thought. Scar's eyes widened slightly as he watched. So she was a healer as well? Just how many abilities did this girl _have_? "Just four, including my healing. Though they go a long way…I'm ashamed I was forced to use more than just my teleportation, though…and to use my Telepathy to read your next moves? Dishonorable, but it must be done."Scar punched the ground in rage, using his alchemy to shatter and break up the terrain into large chunks along a path leading straight to his adversary.

Shonan made her way back to her room, somewhat downhearted. Back to the prick and his prickly ways…'twas like some imbecile had shoved a stick up his behind, to put it kindly…but wait, all she had to do was give him less reasons to be a prick! Ingenious! But wait, the palm tree couldn't leave the cell…Colonel Pony was an even bigger prick than the tree, a true wet blanket, however ironic it may sound…As Shonan walked into her cell, still musing, sidestepped a large spot within her peripheral vision, and went to sit on her 2nd bunk. She glanced up briefly and did a rapid double-take. So that's what the spot was…a large, still somewhat (but not very) fresh pool of blood…goddammit! What'd the tree kill this time? Shonan's sharp ears picked up a muffled sound coming from her cave. Bending down over the side of the bed, she thrust aside the sheet creating her cave with such flourish, her non-existent drama actors would be proud. She was intent on murdering Envy now, orders or not, for what he'd done. If the blood seeped through a certain part of the floor, her candy stash would be ruined! It's hard work hiding that thing! Not to mention he entered her cave! Instead, she pulled back a bit in shock upon seeing Chi, bound by duct tape, and struggling to escape her bonds.

"Chi!" Shonan exclaimed. "What happened? How'd you get here? I just saw you minutes ago!" she cried, freeing her demon friend.

"I came through the front door" Chi responded, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Really? There's a front door?" Shonan asked, tilting her head to one side.

"No, genius. Some bitch that looked like a fucking palm tree kidnapped me! _Me, _the savage, ever powerful, feline blood demon! The Crimson menace! My dignity…It'll never recover…"

"Umm, Chi? You've never been called any of those things…" Shonan pointed out.

"Shush, child. Don't rain on my parade. I'm in a ranting and raging mood." Chi said, closing her eyes and pressing a finger to Shonan's mouth, silencing her. A few moments later, she reopened her eyes and removed her hand . "Besides, what do you mean by you just saw me? I've been here for three goddamned hours! That stupid plant girl shapeshifted to look like me! It adds insult to injury, you know?" Chi fumed.

"Then mind explaining the pool of blood on the floor?" Shonan questioned.

"I managed to slit my wrist and draw a bit of blood. I tried to escape, but you have weird duct tape that prevented that…" Chi explained. However, Shonan was already musing about another topic.

"Shapeshifting plant girl?...Oh! Uoy must mean the palm tree! What was his name again? Any…Ivy…Viney…oh, yeah! Envy!"

"His? It's a guy?!" Chi stared at Shonan for a moment, then burst out lauging. Soon, Shonan was laughing with her. That is, until she remembered that "Chi" had left after the water balloon war. Then, fear enterd her eyes as she imagined her superiors' (and her sister's) wrath. She'd let the prisioner escape. And on a Saturday, no less. She should've remembered the guards wouldn't be there! _Gah, stupid mistakes, stupid mistakes! Not to mention…progress update…I'm dead…I may be as close to immortal as one gets, but I'm sooooo dead… _Shonan thought. She dreaded the thought of having to face the Fuhrer and the other high-ranking officials from throughout the Amestris military…Chi glanced at Shonan's worried face.

"Hey, what's wrong?" she asked. Shonan turned to her, grim-faced and trembling slightly.

"I have to go deliver my progress report…Wish me luck, Chi…I may come back in a box, packed like a broken jigsaw puzzle."

"And swearing the whole time!" Chi added, laughing. Shonan chuckled nervously and headed upstairs to the Fuhrer's office, where her report was due. She opened the door, and putting on her hyperactive façade once more, entered.

"Hey everyone!"

"You're late" Mustang growled.

"Aw, don't be such a stiff, Colonel Pony!" she laughed, messing up Mustang's hair. "I got lost on the road of life! There was an old lady who needed help crossing the street! So naturally, I just had ot help!"

"You liar! Since when do you help little old ladies?" cried Mustang. Shonan shrugged. King Bradley laughed.

"I like this girl, she has plenty of spirit!"

"Ah! A pirate! Save me, my equestrian friend!" cried Shonan, pointing at the Fuhrer and hiding behind Mustang, who immediately shoved her away. The Fuhrer's smile faltered momentarily.

"I requested that some soldiers from each base come here to see how you're handling the prisoner." he stated.

"Joy, let me meet the new freaks!" said Shonan, going over to the line of soldiers, who were standing at attention. The most notable new people (to Shonan, at least) were Major Armstrong, his sister and Major Miles from Briggs, and Kimblee. Shonan bounded over to the lesser officials, introducing herself and politely letting them present their names and titles to her. Then, she got to Miles. "Hi! I'm Shonan and – oh, no no no. That's not right at all! An Ishbalan cannot have white hair, not at all! The ideal Ishbalan has dark skin, red eyes, and either blonde or brown hair, but never white!" (1) She went to a cabinet that not many people were aware even existed, and got a box of blonde hair dye (why it was there, no one knows). She went back to Miles and placed it in his hand. "Freakin albino, use this." Then, she moved to Kimblee. She stared at him for fifteen seconds, a puzzled expression adorning her face. In truth, she was just watching how quickly he got annoyed and snapped.

"What? Is there something on my face or something?" he asked irritably.

"Queer alert!" Shonan yelled, running to the nearest person, which just happened to be Major Armstrong, sparkles and all. She cried ut in frightened surprise and hid behind his sister, accusing him of being an "overly muscled creep after me and Chi's souls".

"Aw, come on, little one, you have to respect your elders! Do these muscles look like they could tell anything but the truth?" asked Major Armstrong, now suddenly shirtless and flexing his body builder-like muscles. Shona yelped and turned into her cat form, jumping to the tallest place she could find (took a few jumps, though), a shelf with a few boxes and a plant on it. From there, she hissed at everyone she didn't like. Basically, she hissed at everyone. There people were weird! She'd rather be stuck with the palm tree on some deserted island than be stuck in a room with these creeps! The fuhrer coughed to gain everyone's attention.

"Now that we've had an example of your psychological torture, can we have that report on the prisoner, Miss Shonan?" he asked with a smile. But not a happy smile. Oh, no. One of those malicious smiles, demanding that you comply to whatever the person says – or else. Shonan reluctantly jumped down from the shelf and returned to her human form. Most of the soldiers in the room were pretty stunned at her transformation, having known only that she was a blue-haired psycho. Shonan decided to ignore the title for the time being, due to the Fuhrer's intimidating smile.

"Well…you see…I kindamaybesortamayvelosthim." She said, rushing the end. Mustang, being the only person in the room who had to deal with her craziness at least once week (and therefore was the only one who understood her, though just barely), jumped out of his seat, yelling.

"_WHAT!?_ You lost the homunculus? Of all the things, how do you manage to screw up that badly?" At those words, everyone began to either talk/yell amongst themselves angrily and/or glare at Shonan evilly. Shonan shrunk back into the shadows, hoping to slip away unnoticed. Unfortunately, she had no such luck. General Olivia Armstrong's hand shot to Shonan's neck, grabbing her choker and lifting her up to eye level, just loose enough to allow her to talk.

"How did this happen?" she growled.

"The plant kinda outsmarted me by transforming into Chi after kidnapping her – gah!" General Armstrong tightened her grip.

"General." The Fuhrer began. "Let the girl go, she needs to breathe." General Armstrong reluctantly let go of Shonan, who gasped and began massaging her neck. It didn't hurt _too_ badly, now that it had begun bruising where the choker had begun cutting into her skin a bit. Kimblee smirked, receiving a vicious glare from Shonan.

"Wipe that goddamned smirk off your face, you ponytailed pedo…" Kimblee looked shocked she could still talk, let alone say something so insulting. However, the shock passed quickly and he just glared at her."

"Shonan." Shonan halted her little glaring contest with Kimblee to look at the Fuhrer. "One of the reasons we trusted you to look after the prisoner is because the prisoner wouldn't be able to kill you on sight and escape, not to mention you could keep him in check. How on earth did you let him outsmart you?"

"It couldn't have been _that _hard…" murmured Mustang.

"Shut it, Colonel Pony." Shonan snapped. "It's not like I _let_ him escape, he just did! Besides, Chi's the one who let herself get kidnapped, you know!"

"Where is she now?" the Fuhrer asked.

"My room" Shonan said smugly, but then instantly regretting it when she realized what he was going to do.

"Major Miles, please go fetch her." Miles nodded, then went to fetch Chi. Minutes later, Chi was up in the Fuhrer's office, standing next to Shonan, glaring daggers at her. "Since you two lost the prisoner, you'll have to find him." The Fuhrer sentenced.

"What!? B-but…that's nearly impossible!" cried Shonan.

"So was losing the prisoner." Miles retorted. Shonan shrank back a bit.

"Fine, we'll go. Come, Chi. I have a plan." The two left the office, then went to the front of the library to discuss their plan.

"So, what's your plan?" Chi asked, arms crossed.

"We ask Hay-Lin for help."

"That's a good plan. Now use your hologram screen so I can see her as well."

"Kay." Shonan brought up her holographic screen (ah, the wonders of modern technology) and prepared to tell her sister the bad news.

Hay-Lin just barely dodged the mainstream of the destructive path sent at her, jumping out of the way, although she still got hit with many small chunks of the ground that were flying from the path. She landed a bit farther away to catch her breath. She sensed someone trying to contact her, but paid it no heed. It couldn't possibly be more important than this! _Oi, braniac,_ 'wonderful. The one person I can't ignore decides to contact me in the middle of a life or death fight…' Hay-Lin thought. _We have a small problem…__ What?_ Hay-Lin asked irritably. _We, that is, Chi and I, we kinda lost the homun…humus…homuncu…oh, screw it. We lost the homo…_

"You _what?_ You _lost_ the prisoner?" Hay-Lin burst out, shouting out loud by accident. A holographic screen with Shonan and Chi's faces appeared in front of her.

"Hey, hey, don't yell at us! We already got yelled at by the Fuhrer, the Armstrongs, Miles, Mustang, Kimblee, and a bunch of others who's names I don't remember!" Shonan complained.

"Wow, you actually called him Mustang…" murmered Hay-Lin.

"Of course! He freakin scared us half to death!" Chi cried. Hay-Lin sighed.

"There's a tracking device attached to the choker I'm assuming you gave Envy. Use your hologram to connect to it. It's strongest if he's wearing it, but it also attaches to his Ki if he's touched it, so you can track him through that as well if he's not too far away from it." Shonan blinked.

"Well, that's useful! Thanks! Come, Chi. Let's go find our homo before Colonel Pony attempts to kill us." The hologram blinked off.

"What was that? Scar asked, half hostile, half genuinely curious.

"My idiot sister lost the homunculus she was guarding." Scar growled at the word 'homunculus', but she continued. "She was supposed to put him through psychological torture, as well as making sure he doesn't escape, but she lost him. I don't know how, but she did."

"The enemy of my enemy is my friend. However, your sister is now my enemy too, since she let it escape, making you an even bigger enemy than before." Scar snarled, running to where Hay-Lin was standing, leaving a path of destruction behind him as he let his right arm nearly drag along the ground. Hay-Lin attempted to teleport away, but Scar managed to grab her neck just moments before she was able too, cancelling out the teleportation. A look of panic entered Hay-Lin's eyes as she realized that his alchemy could cancel out her ability. "You're not getting away this time" he growled. Unseen to him, Hay-Lin sported a small grin. Suddenly, Scar found himself on the ground, the cold, unforgiving blade of a katana drawing a thin line of blood on his neck. (2)

"I'm quite surprised such a simple helpless act could fool you, Scar. Don't you know that Ki can be explosive when applied correctly?" Hay-Lin said, raising her blade to end his life, when a shout sounded through the room.

"STOP!" a little girl, about 8 or 9 years in age, stood in the doorway. She had black hair, and wore an eastern outfit, most likely from Xing. Accompanying her was a small panda. Hay-Lin paused. "Please, don't kill Scar-san! He's a good person!" The girl ran over to Scar and spread her arms in a protective manner.

"And why shouldn't I He is my enemy, after all, and I was sent to kill him. " Hay-Lin said coldly.

"He promised to help me! He can't die yet! Please, miss, let him live!" the girl cried desperately. For a moment, Hay-Lin saw a flash of her younger self in the girl. She hesitated for a moment, then made her move.

Scar watched as the lethal metal blade flashed, about to cut down both him and May Chang. He closed his eyes, accepting that this was his punishment from Ishbala for not sufficiently avenging his people. But instead of feeling the harsh blade cut through his flesh, he heard the metallic clatter of the sword hitting the ground. He opened his eyes in surprise, unable to believe his ears. The girl had cast aside her sword and begun to leave. Scar got up, still quite confused.

"Why?" he asked. "Why did you spare me? You're directly disobeying your orders, you know."

"Don't remind me, I know." Said Hay-Lin, turning around slightly. "it's just that your little friend reminded me of something I myself still need to do, and I cannot allow myself to become distracted from that goal by becoming the military's pet, doing whatever they ask of me. But keep in mind that next time you won't be so lucky. I may need to borrow your cloak to fool the colonel though. I can't just come back empty-handed…" she trailed off as Scar complied, removing his cloak and handing it to her.

"It's nice to know that at least one person hasn't been fully corrupted by the military. You're a formidable opponent, cold-blooded even, yet you managed to find your morals once more and spare me. I'm afraid I cannot say that about myself, though, no matter how important my task is. I hope that next time we meet, we may be allies." Scar said.

"I can't guarantee anything." said Hay-Lin, her back once more to Scar and the girl, leaving.

**Footnotes:**

**This chapter was written way back when I was still reading the manga and was under the impression that all Ishbalans had blonde hair, maybe brown (though that's pushing it quite a bit). I had a really big shock when the cover of one of the books (volume 17 I think) depicted Miles with white hair. I almost had a heart attack.**

**What happened here is that Hay-Lin focused all of her energy/aura/ki into the spot on her neck that Scar had grabbed her, then suddenly released it, creating an explosive force strong enough to knock Scar to the ground, losing his grip on her neck. However, it was very quick and sudden, so it took him by surprise. If he'd been expecting something of the sort, he could've easily blocked it.**

**A/N: I'm soooooo soory about the long wait! I tend to procastinate quite a bit, especially with my already-written-out-on-paper strories...Hopefully the length/quality makes up for it? Maybe? I'll try and try as much as possible in the 3 days left before school starts as well. Though be warned. The main reason I've taken so long is becuase I type on the computer. The computer has animes to watch, mangas to read, and DA to browse, so I end up forgetting all else...hehehe...**

**On another note, did you think I'd actually kill off Scar? Especially considering how impostant he becomes later on? Nah! Sorry! I also revised this chapter while typing it out and tried to make Shonan and Hay-Lin less Mary-Sue-ish. I'm kinda afraid they're a bit too powerful, so I'm going to have very strict control on how much power I give them. One example is Shonan's holograms. You'll notice that in my other stories, they're either illusions or genjutsu (depends on the fandom). Now, I just made it so she has some sort of small electronic appliance that allows her to use holograms. So, I hope you like the chapter!**


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